"At last, the Wisecrackin' Guru finally speaks and reveals his little known and jealously guarded secret for how to make money now!" MAKE MONEY "At last, the Wisecrackin' Guru finally speaks and reveals his little known and jealously guarded secret for how to make money now!""At last, the Wisecrackin' Guru finally speaks and reveals his little known and jealously guarded secret for how to make money now!
" By The Wisecrackin' Guru Hi there, how's it going?
I'm the Wisecrackin' Guru.
Yes, that'sme, the internet marketing extraordinaire that you've all heardabout, and I'm here to help you, with the best money making tipyou'll ever learn.
Hey, I'm rich and you're not, but don'tworry, I'll still talk to you.
Even though I'm way too importantto do anything like that.
But I'm feeling generous today so I'llgive you the glorious gift of one minute of my precious time.
But please- try to keep drooling to a minimum.
You might think I'm an obnoxious jerk, but you'll get over it.
Iprefer to think of myself as lovable and adorable and here tohelp you.
I tell it like it is- you want to hear the truthright?
Right! And in this article I'm gonna reveal to you agreat truth that ALL rich people have in common.
And once youknow and apply this great truth, then YOU too will know what ittakes to make money and get rich.
So who the heck am I?
I'm the guy whose ferrari you see takingup two parking spots and you think to yourself "You bastard!
"And you know what- you're absolutely right.
But I couldn't careless cause I'm filthy rich.
You've probably heard of my cousinthe Rich Jerk.
Yes, that's him- the famous millionaire maker.
He's so smart that he's got his own fan club.
I know, I knowwhat you're thinking- you're thinking "What a brilliant genepool".
Well, if you insist.
So how's it going anyway?
How's life been treating ya?
Yes Iknow- life's tough I hear you moan.
It's getting harder andharder to make ends meet on the pathetic 20 bucks an hour yourmiserable employer pays you.
Life's not fair right?
Well ofcourse life's fair! If you want to be rich then you have toactually do something to make it happen! Yes that's right myfriend!
How ya gonna make more money if your bum is permanentlywelded to the couch?
You have to unmould your bum off the couch,you can do it! Yes, grab a crow bar and prise it off slowly, andlisten up cause I've got something to tell ya.
Like they say- the greatest journey ever made started out with asingle step, and the first step you can make is away from the TVand the six- pack, at least for a minute while I tell yousomething.
I tell it like it is.
I cut through the bullcrap.
Sure I might offend you, but you'll get over it.
You might thinkI'm rude and obnoxious and once again you're absolutely right!But I don't care cause I'm filthy rich.
And whether you like itor not you want to be filthy rich too like me or else youwouldn't be reading this now.
So let me tell you this fact- youcan never get filthy rich just earning 20 bucks an hour, orwhatever pathetic amount your employer pays you.
You have totake ACTION and do something extra if you want to make moremoney and be rich.
And that my friend is part one of THE greattruth that you must know.
All successful people take action-they don't just sit around and wait for something to happen.
But there's one more part to this secret that most people neverfind out.
And here it is: If you're gonna take action, then youhave to make sure it's the right kind of action.
That's right-if you want to get rich then the action you take must be gearedtowards making you rich.
I mean, getting up at 6.
00am everymorning and killing yourself to get ready and drive to work isaction, but it sure as heck ain't the kind of action that'sgonna make you rich.
If you wanna take the right kind of action that's gonna make yourich then there's only one way to do it and this is it: onlytake advice off people who are already successful! And nobodyelse!
Sounds simple when you put it like that huh?
But mostpeople spend their whole lives doing the exact opposite.
Mostpeople spend their lives taking crappy advice off losers.
And that my friend is the golden secret that most people never"get".
Sure, Fred your next door neighbour might think he's anexpert in the sharemarket and try to dish out his money makingtips to you.
But is he rich?
No! And what about your great AuntMildred who constantly lectures you about what kind of job youshould have if you want to make more money.
Is she rich?
No! Andwhat about your boss at work who spends all day telling you howhopeless you are.
Is he rich?
No! So why should you take adviceoff them?
The best retort you can give all these big mouthso-called-experts is simply this: "If you're so smart, why ain'tYOU rich?
" It works every time!
Just try it and see how quicklythey vanish! "But I've got a good job" I hear you wail!.
Sureyou've got a good job, but that miserable 20 bucks an hour isn'tgonna last forever you know.
Sooner or later you're gonna needmore money just to survive, and then what are you gonna do?
Sellyour false teeth?
And anyway, do you really want to spend therest of your life being bossed around and abused by some bastard20 year old boss?
I mean, most of the miserable bosses out therehave got the kinds of personalities that light up a room- whenthey walk out!And watch out if you make a mistake!
They'll whip you till yalight and fluffy.
Personally, I couldn't care less- I'm alreadyfilthy rich- you're the one who's gonna be a miserable 60 yearold employee one day, with a whinging 20 year old boss tellingyou what to do.
Unless you decide to take some action!
You know that facts show that if you are only an employeeworking for an hourly wage, you have less than a 1% chance ofretiring rich.
I don't know about you but I don't like thoseodds one bit.
You wouldn't even bet on a horse race with thoseodds.
I mean, if a bookie offered you those odds on a horse raceyou'd tell him to get stuffed right?
So why would you want togamble your whole future with those same odds?
Sheesh!
And even if you are one of those people who actually likes goingto work for the social life, at least when you're filthy richyou can tell your boss to get stuffed with an extra ring ofconfidence.
It's a beautiful thing to see.
But hey, I'm not a total snob.
I've even got a few friendsmyself who work for an hourly wage, sure I do.
One of them cameout for a drink with me recently.
He's still paying it off.
Hey, I know that some people think that work can be a greatinstitution- but I'm not ready for an institution.
I mean, you could always go to university or college where theygive you books about how to make money and get rich.
These booksshould not be tossed aside lightly.
They should be thrown withgreat force.
Their authors never made a dime anyway.
I mean-have you ever seen a university professor rocking up to work ina ferrari?
Didn't think so.
And anyway- if textbooks made yourich then librarians would all be millionaires.
Ever seen amillionaire librarian?
Didn't think so.
Like I said, the authors of those textbooks never made a dime inthe real world anyway- only in their textbook fantasies.
I mean,if you're gonna take financial advice from somebody, then atleast make sure it's from somebody who's actually making moneyin the real world.
Duh!And how much harder it is if you have kids! Yes, those adorabledarling whining little money munchers can clean out your bankaccount in no time!
I mean, don't get me wrong, I've got nothingagainst kids- in fact a lot of good friends of mine used to bekids.
It's just that if you've got some you might as well cut ahole in the bottom of your purse or wallet and carry it aroundlike that, just to get into practise.
But enough about me.
Let's talk about you.
What do you think ofme?
Yes, I know, I know- you think I'm lovable and adorable.
It's only natural that you feel that way.
In fact, I'm soimportant that I can't even believe that I'm sitting heretalking to you right now.
Like I said, I couldn't care less if you think I'm obnoxious.
Ilike it that way.
At least that way you'll stay away from me ifyou ever see me in the street.
I'm way too important to careanyway.
I mean don't get me wrong, I love humanity- it's justthe people I can't stand.
Anyway, stop ya whining.
Being filthy rich can have itsdrawbacks too you know.
Like when you tell them to paint yourporsche medium salmon, and they do it orange instead.
Sheesh!And you thought you had problems!
Or when your pet cheetah eatstoo much caviar, and then gets an upset stomach and passes windfor three days.
Now that's a problem! Sheesh!
And you thoughtyou had problems trying to earn a living.
So what are you gonna do?
Are you gonna sit there and bemiserable, or are you gonna take action?
You can ignore thisarticle and keep working hard for the rest of your life for amiserable 20 bucks an hour, or whatever pathetic amount youmake, and when you're sick of it, you'll be back.
Or else youcan take action and start taking steps right now to improve yourfinancial situation.
And that, my friend is the secret to riches-you can put it off, or you can take action right now to improveyour life.
The choice is yours!
Good luck to you! from The Wisecrackin' Guru Ps- Whatever you decide, I'll be down by the pool sippingcocktails.
About the author:Hey, I'm way too important to sit here and write out a resourcebox, so I'll make it short.
If you want to stop being a patheticloser and start making money then come tohttp://www.
makeprofit.
com.
au and find out how.
Personally, Icouldn't care less whether you do or not.
I'm not about to begyou to come to my website.
I'm already filthy rich- you're theone with the problem.
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